Meg's & Lon's Magnificent Adventure: Lima

Elona Typing
On arrival in Lima we were bombarded by a very funky smell; a cut between fish and burnt rice.
We touch down in Lima and the first port of call after collecting our luggage is Budget. We decided to rent a car for the week as we thought this would be easier to get to and from the Brazilian Embassy and afford us the luxury of a day or two driving just outside of Lima if things were going well with the visa situation. Initially we were hoping to drop off our visa applications to the embassy the afternoon we arrived. This quickly became impossible, with our plane arriving late and the paperwork to rent a car in Lima took an exhausting hour and a half. We had selected a small compact – the budget man advised that this car is not able to do highway driving. We upgraded; no worries. Well there was one worry, we are feeling a lot more comfortable driving on the other side of the road these days – not so sure about doing it in a manual car? though???!!!!!!

We went to collect the car; a lovely 2011 Kia. We packed up the car with our luggage and the lovely man who only spoke Spanish went through the car and locked all the doors once we were inside and gave us explicit instructions to always keep the doors locked – HHMMMMMMMM – ok then, extra caution required in Lima.

Meg's Typing

Elona was in the driver’s seat as we had decided that she was the more aggressive driver and the very little we had heard about Lima traffic we were going to need any edge we could manage. So, car packed with luggage – Check; All doors locked – Check; Navman working – Check; remember how to drive a manual – Check. Pulling out of the Budget carpark at the airport and S%&# the car DOES NOT have power steering!! No kidding, who would have thought that a 2011 Kia doesn’t have power steering as a standard – we certainly didn’t – but now we know to ask the question.

I have to say Elona managed to navigate the erratic traffic, which did not appear to adhere to any known or semblance of known road rules, fantastically. Where there was two clear lanes indicated on the road for cars to follow there was a “honking” mess of cars forming up to 5 lanes. Hazard lights were often used as a polite way to state ‘that the driver was not planning on driving in any safe manner, so anticipate driving near me at your own risk’.

Elona Typing

Now just imagine me driving in and amongst this mayhem!!! I am proud to say that I don't use the horn though Megs laughs hysterically everytime I vocally go Beep Beep (just like the Road Runner) It makes me feel better anyway - I won't mention the times that swear words just fly out of my mouth when cars get so awfully close ( and I was trying so desperately since Whistler and seeing the young Australians use awful language continually to curb my language )

If you visit Lima, bring your ear-plugs. The cabs and buses have an obsession with their horns. The streets are alive with noise. Buses here are private too... they post their routes on the front window and stop wherever they are waved down. They compete for your business by waving you aboard and honking at you. I'm not sure why, but it seems that they think the more they honk, the more likely it is that you will need a ride. The honking is incessant.

Taxis honk for a million reasons: there's the "do you want a ride" honk and the "are you sure you don't want a ride" honk and the "I'm coming thru this intersection" honk and the "the light is green" honk and the "don't get in my way" honk and the "bring me a bottle of water" honk for the street corner merchants and the "I'm merging left or right" honk and the "everyone else is honking" honk and the "you're not moving fast enough" honk and at least a dozen other varieties. And if they are not honking on the block you are in, they will be honking in the next block.

Meg's Typing

After a stressful drive where emergency chocolate was required - seriously she stopped and yelled "I need chocolate now!!!"- we arrived safe and sound at our hotel in Miraflores, checked in and settled in for the evening. We were up early Tuesday morning to be at the embassy when they opened for applications. We arrived and were 3^rd in line – excellent. After a relatively short wait, we were called to the counter and we asked the lovely man if he spoke English, he responded with a definite “NO”. Elona switched to Spanish and we were in luck. The process was relatively easy – thankfully. We had completed all the necessary paperwork with our research in Cusco and just had to walk down to the bank and pay $35US to the Embassy’s account. Having accomplished this we were told that the application would be processed and to return to pick up our passports at 4.30 on Thursday – fantastic. Only took 2 hours; we had expected most of the day – off we went to explore Miraflores.

When researching where to stay whilst in Lima, we turned to Lonely Planet initially – they said straight out, “Don’t stay, only pass through, there is nothing to see in Lima with its styrofoam sky – or something very similar”. This depiction did not ring truer than when we went to the coastline of Miraflores – visibility zero - check out the photos.

We spent the day just exploring the area of Miraflores and found the much needed cheaper option for our wshing – we haven’t really mentioned this much in the blog but it is a continuing problem to find places to do laundry that’s not found in the bathroom where you’re staying; we do use this option often though. But we found a lovely lady who would do our washing by weight as opposed to items – this can be very expensive!!

To cut a long and not so interesting story of Lima short – we managed a movie: Battle Los Angeles- we both felt it was a great movie; I even cried a little but for the people who know me this is not an unusual event in a movie! We explored further out of the area we were staying in after research on the net and were surprised that some of the areas mentioned that were great were NOT so great but it did motivate us to go a little further afield and hence we got into the car to go to Pisco. Pisco is the namesake of a lemon alcoholic beverage – actually very nice and the place was two and a half hours away – so off we set.

The amazing landscape we found just outside of Lima itself was very dessert like: dirty dessert but dessert none the less. We were driving along the coastline expecting to see the coast utilized for tourist things but realistically not much effort was made in this department like in other countries. As always cars zoomed by us doing way over the speed limit and we as usual were not slow but keeping the speed limit as there were some pretty dodgy cars and trucks on this road that going the speeds they were we were afraid some of them would just self combust!! The wheels on some the trucks were at such skewed angles that you wouldn’t expect the wheels to be turning at all!!

We passed many little shops and weirdly bus stations on the highway where people just walk across to go to the little markets lining the hwy– not the safest option that’s for sure. It was in one of these areas where the speed sign went from 100 to 35 straight away –no signs inbetween!! Hence the cars that were around me and myself were all picked up by a group of police officers. They proceeded to check the cars (not a bad thing – maybe they will take the crap ones off the road!) but when they found us; two Australian females in a rented car WITHOUT passports they decided to keep us and let everyone else go! Fabulous!! What ensued was a lengthy conversation at the window in Spanish about how this area looks no different to all the other areas etc He proceeds to write us a ticket and tells me it will cost $400 soles (this is about $200US) – You can imagine the shock and then of course the whole female, take your sunnies off, bat your eyelids thing started – to no avail I might add – I think I’m getting old!! Anyway I told him we didn’t have the money – which was not entirely true but the fact that no one else got pulled over pissed me right off!! He then said that if we paid now we would pay $200 to him if not $400 over there – let me point out here that his finger is pointing into the dessert!!! I at this point had clicked on and not being so nice now started on the “I know what you are going to do – you have all my details I pay you $200 and you still send me a bill for $400 and I will end up paying $600” He begins to cross out the information on the ticket assuring me that that would not happen and see it is now null and void HHHHmmmmm. I tell him we don’t have the $200 and he tells me to ask my friend (ie Megs) for some money – I tell him that we only have $150 between us while my mind is madly trying to work out how to get that money out of my purse with his big head in the window without seeing that in fact I not only have more than that but have US dollars as well. This is something I did remedy from this point on – minimum money in the wallet where it can be seen at all times!!!!

He took the $150 and I asked for a receipt – not going to happen – didn’t think it really would because the $150 would be enough for the lot of them to go and have lunch on us!!! And when we went up the road about 5kms we decided that this trip was expensive enough and the fact that we would have to buy lunch and then refill the tank urged us to turn the car around and head back. And would you believe the cops were nowhere to be found – shock horror. What is really disappointing is that we held the police in high regard in Peru up to this point but after this little bribing incident we’ve decided Cusco is the place where we hold the police in high regard. SHAME on you Lima!!!

We put this behind us and Lima passed without any more incidents. Thank you to the lovely man at the Brazilian Embassy who was always friendly and helpful and who handed us our passports with visas intact! We waved goodbye to Lima and wholeheartedly agreed with Lonely Planet – seriously people just make it a short stop over!! Brazil here we come.

We found a fantastic hotel - only 3 stars and felt like 5. Way to go Booking.com

Check out the shower - FANTASTIC!

These are the lovely clear skies of Lima??!!

Slow traffic day on the roads of Miraflores

Cautious drivers everywhere!!!!!!!!

Barranco - This is the front half of the church - the back half is completely demolished - go figure!!

More cautious Sunday drivers - this is seriously tame to what is can be!

Church (still in use) situated in the main square of Barranco

This was the clearest couple of hours in the 5 days we were in Lima.

and even then not so clear.

Can you see the coast line?

View from the top of the cliffs looking out towards the ocean from Barranco.

You might be able to see it just a smidgeon better in this view.

Serious Lonely Planet was spot on where they described Lima has having a sky like styrofoam.

There were some lovely gardens

and park areas located within major residential areas and along the coast.

The roadworthiness of most of the vehicles, especially the truck was astonishingly poor.

Wheels wobbled all over the place.

On our intrepid day trip outside of the main city of Lima

we were amazed to find desert landscape.

With very poor living conditions.

As we drove out of Lima we were faced with massive billboards,

advertising just about every product know to man.

Though on the way back you only got to see the scaffolding of the billboard.

Completely different from Cusco, which was so lush and green.

View looking down to the main shopping district in Miraflores,

and has a wonderful view of the coast of Peru when there is the occasional clear day.

This atmospheric phenomenon could reduce visibility to 100 meters, in a matter of minutes.

We were not sure where to call it pollution as it rolled in from the ocean across the coast, though it was not moist like fog??? Styrofoam was the best description we could come up with.